Thursday, February 09, 2006

 

Am I Obsessive or Just "Particular"?

I frequently have conversations with myself. (Which is never a good sign, but I'm not here to talk about my schizophrenia right now. [And neither am I!]). Lately, these thoughts been revolving about whether or not I have obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). While I think I can unequivocally say that I don't have OCD, I can't firmly state that I don't have "issues."

This last occurred to me the other day when I was in class, fishing for a pen in my backpack. At the beginning of the semester, I bought a 2-pack of pens. They're the clicky, see-through ones, nothing too fancy. Anyway, I was alternating them since I couldn't tell them apart. Then at one point last semester, I broke off the little plastic thing that clips to your pocket. (What is that thing anyway? Where's Rich Hall's and his Sniglets when you need them?)

Well, now I can tell my pens apart. So I kept using the one with the broken doohickey. Since it was see-through, I eventually noticed that I'd used a lot of ink. Then I thought about how I never really used a pen until it ran out of ink. Have you? Think about it. I always seem to pick up pens that don't work. But if you open them up, you see they have lots of ink. I lose a lot of pens too. So if I could actually use a pen until it ran out of ink, I could cross it off my "Things To Do Before I Die" list. (Other items on that list? "Drink a beer" and "eat a pizza." I don't plan on living much longer. Perhaps if I didn't keep adding those two items to my list every time I cross them off....)

Anyway, I've been writing with this one pen all for some time now. It'd been running low. The ink started getting streaky and unreliable. I had to press extra hard to make it come out. But I wasn't just going to throw it away! Not when I was so close to my goal! A couple of weeks ago, I had to put it on special duty. I could only use it on non-writing-intensive things like Sudokus or crosswords. I felt like I was putting it in a nursing home or something.

Well, it didn't last long in the home. On Tuesday, Clicky died. I shed a tear, I said a few words and then I tossed it in the trash. Clicky Jr. came out of the bag and showed me what I was missing by sticking with the old guy so long. Clicky Jr. flowed great and made writing a joy. (Sadly, he didn't make my handwriting any more legible. I totally should have been a doctor. Or maybe I'm actually left-handed and don't know it. Cuz I can't write for shit with my right one.)

It's actually a relief for me to not have to worry about this stupid pen anymore. I've accomplished my (pathetic) goal and now I don't have to worry about being so obsessive about it. Now I can obsess about how I only have one pen in my bag and what I'll do if I lose it.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

 

Grammys Shmammys!

The Grammy's were finally on last night. I've been anxiously awaiting them all year. I haven't been this interested in a TV event since Joanie and Chachi decided to start having their own comical adventures.

The Grammy's are one of the worst shows that has ever aired on TV. And this is coming from someone who routinely watches Yes Dear because there's nothing else on TV at 4:00. I'm sure I would find the Grammy's more interesting if I followed popular music. But I don't. In fact, I have a hard time figuring out why "popular" music is popular. I think there might be a chronic hearing problem developing in this country. That could be the only explanation for Ruben Studdard being a household name. Or maybe it's because he's a household all by himself.

I used to follow the Grammy's when I was a kid. That all changed in 1989 when I was watching the show while my priest molested me. Actually, I wish he had. Instead, Jethro Tull beat out Metallica and Guns 'N' Roses for best Hard Rock/Heavy Metal Performance. Apparently, the voters looked at the category logically. "They all have drums. They all have guitars. But Jethro Tull has a flute. It's made out of metal. It's probably heavy. I think we have a winner for Heavy Metal! Now let's go drop some more acid!"

Anyway, I haven't really watched the Grammy's since then, and I think the music world passed me. Not that I'm complaining. I'm just waiting until they start an awards show for Angry White Guy Rock Bands!

Monday, February 06, 2006

 

Return of the Mrs. David Brent

I can't believe it's been almost a week since I last posted. I didn't realize that. I've got to stop slacking off so much. Because my 2 readers are just dying for more posts.

This goes back a few days, but Mrs. David Brent is at it again. I'm in a group with one of my friends doing investment research. Mrs. David Brent is in another group, annoying the piss out of them. Since I have the worst luck in the world, our two groups merged to do a project.

Last Monday, Mrs. David Brent approached me before class. She wanted to confirm that we're going to be working together. Then she tells me that Joe is their team leader and would I mind if Joe led our bigger team. I said I didn't care, but I also didn't really understand. What the F is a leader?

She goes on to say that the leader assigns tasks and makes sure that all projects get done on time. I told her that with the teams I've worked on, these things are done by consensus. She then told me that Joe would be in charge of making a consensus. I looked at her and told her that that goes against the very definition of consensus.

So Mrs. David Brent told me that she doesn't know me or my friend, so she doesn't feel comfortable trusting us. I told her that we had worked on several projects, and in fact run a student organization together (I'm president, he's VP). At this point, Joe chimes in and says that he doesn't even really want to be a leader of 5 people anyway.

With that issue resolved, we meet with the professor. We're doing research on emerging markets, and we decided to go with Eastern Europe for no apparent reason. The professor told us that Eastern Europe has little data, which will make things difficult. Would we mind doing Latin America? We all say "no" except Mrs. David Brent.

Mrs. David Brent goes on to explain that she'd like to continue working on Eastern Europe on her own if we're going to do Latin America. The professor explains that our group really needs her help. So, Mrs. David Brent says that she doesn't want to do Latin America. Why? Because she has no desire to go there. AND her husband won't let her go there. I look at her and say, "What does that have to do with INVESTING there?" "Well, if I just want to research a place that I want to go visit." I almost just smacked the crap out of her.

The professor agreed to speak to her after class. I then got an email from the professor asking us if we'd mind Mrs. David Brent working with a different group. It was a unanimous "nope." So the good news is that I probably won't have to deal with her on a first-hand basis anymore. The bad news is that it's really going to limit my stories.

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