Thursday, October 12, 2006
Getting Lost in Lost
I’m starting to get more and more into Lost. I’ve listed my grievances with Lost too many times to rehash things now. Yesterday’s episode was exceptional! I found myself literally sitting on the edge of my seat, as I sometimes do during 24. (Of course, part of that was because I couldn’t hear what somebody said, so I hit rewind on the TiVO and leaned in so I could hear it.)
One of the pleasant changes to this season is the addition of Paula Malcomson, who played (plays?) Trixie on Deadwood. (By the way, spoilers will be abounding. Run away!) Paula is one of The Others (Colleen) and she’s only on the screen for about a minute. Somehow, she manages to get herself shot in that minute. But given that she’s a minorly famous TV actor, I’m guessing we’ll be seeing more of her on Lost. And given how good she was (is?) on Deadwood, that’s not a bad thing.
For the second week in a row, though, Lost built up the tension, not by keeping secrets, but by showing what both sides know. And of course, both sides aren’t entirely truthful. For example, Sayid says that the dock is deserted, hasn’t been used in years. Soon, he learns otherwise. But he keeps that info secret because he wants to spring a trap. GREAT! Of course, The Others are onto their tricks. I don’t know how they figured it out. I’m guessing they have cameras all over the island. Or maybe they have infrared goggles for seeing at night. Kind of like the robber that my grampa is convinced broke into his room to steal $20. Ah, the police loved getting calls from him.
Though if I have to issue one complaint about Lost this week, it’s going to be with the flashbacks. I’m generally not a big fan of the flashback devise. I think it’s boring and pointless. I’m sure there are Lost fans out there who study these flashbacks for hints at what’s to come. Or they use it as a character study. Or they try to figure out what actions people have taken in their past that might have led them to the island (and possibly to salvation). Me? I think it’s incredibly boring and a waste of my time.
But that’s not my complaint. In fact, I’m not even going to complain about the fact that the flashback was of Jin and Sun. With subtitles! Nope. My complaint is about the creepy guy they had playing Jin’s lover. He’s a bald asian man. (I’m sure he’s supposed to be Korean, but I doubt he actually is. Hollywood’s funny that way. He’s probably Mexican.) I’ve seen many bald people in my life. I lived with one for a few years. But I’ve never EVER seen anyone so creepy looking as this one. I don’t know if his neck is too long, or if his head is too ovate (look it up). But he just doesn’t look right. And it also looks like he’s CHOSEN to shave his head. If I were him, I would grow some hair. And if I were producing this show, I wouldn’t have hired this actor. Oh, and I would have written a more interesting flashback or done away with the concept entirely. But at least get rid of the creepy bald asian dude.
Anyway, the show ended with a couple interesting twists. One is that Sawyer provoked a fight while he and Kate where doing slave labor. First of all, I think that the slave labor is just a psychological game to mess with their heads. Second of all, Sawyer revealed that the fight was actually a way for him to test how strong all The Others watching them were. But then we find out that Ben (the Head Other) listened to Sawyer tell this all to Kate. Here’s what makes that interesting. At first, we think that Sawyer has The Others figured out and that he’s going to make an escape attempt or something. But then we have to think that The Others are going to lure them into making an escape attempt to teach them a lesson. So, in other words, we really have no idea WHAT’S going to happen. But we know that SOMETHING’S going to happen. And I’m really looking forward to finding out what that “something” is.
The other interesting twist was when Ben revealed to Jack that The Others have contact with the outside world. To prove it, he showed Jack video of the Red Sox winning the World Series, which Jack naturally didn’t believe until he saw it. As Jack was staring at the video all slack-jawed, Ben told him that if Jack cooperates, he could go home. And that’s “home” as in “not on the island anymore” home.
That raises all sorts of questions. What would you do to get off the island? And is the island really worth getting off of? I mean, sure there’s cool stuff back in the real world, like TV and internet porn. But there’s also the continuing angst of the Cubs refusing to win a World Series. If I told you that you could spend the rest of your life living on a tropical island, would you turn me down?
But let’s say that you decide you want off the island. You’re sick of eating the Dharma rations. You want real food. You want a real bed. You just want to go home and let the dog out. Well, what would you be willing to do to get home? Would you kill someone? Would you put one of your friends in danger? Would you cut off a finger? What are your limits? And could you live with yourself afterwards? More importantly, could you live with not knowing the secrets of the island? I don’t think I could. In fact, I’d have no problem becoming all buddy-buddy with Ben just to find out why the hell they crashed and what the fuck was up with those polar bears. But maybe that’s just me.
One of the pleasant changes to this season is the addition of Paula Malcomson, who played (plays?) Trixie on Deadwood. (By the way, spoilers will be abounding. Run away!) Paula is one of The Others (Colleen) and she’s only on the screen for about a minute. Somehow, she manages to get herself shot in that minute. But given that she’s a minorly famous TV actor, I’m guessing we’ll be seeing more of her on Lost. And given how good she was (is?) on Deadwood, that’s not a bad thing.
For the second week in a row, though, Lost built up the tension, not by keeping secrets, but by showing what both sides know. And of course, both sides aren’t entirely truthful. For example, Sayid says that the dock is deserted, hasn’t been used in years. Soon, he learns otherwise. But he keeps that info secret because he wants to spring a trap. GREAT! Of course, The Others are onto their tricks. I don’t know how they figured it out. I’m guessing they have cameras all over the island. Or maybe they have infrared goggles for seeing at night. Kind of like the robber that my grampa is convinced broke into his room to steal $20. Ah, the police loved getting calls from him.
Though if I have to issue one complaint about Lost this week, it’s going to be with the flashbacks. I’m generally not a big fan of the flashback devise. I think it’s boring and pointless. I’m sure there are Lost fans out there who study these flashbacks for hints at what’s to come. Or they use it as a character study. Or they try to figure out what actions people have taken in their past that might have led them to the island (and possibly to salvation). Me? I think it’s incredibly boring and a waste of my time.
But that’s not my complaint. In fact, I’m not even going to complain about the fact that the flashback was of Jin and Sun. With subtitles! Nope. My complaint is about the creepy guy they had playing Jin’s lover. He’s a bald asian man. (I’m sure he’s supposed to be Korean, but I doubt he actually is. Hollywood’s funny that way. He’s probably Mexican.) I’ve seen many bald people in my life. I lived with one for a few years. But I’ve never EVER seen anyone so creepy looking as this one. I don’t know if his neck is too long, or if his head is too ovate (look it up). But he just doesn’t look right. And it also looks like he’s CHOSEN to shave his head. If I were him, I would grow some hair. And if I were producing this show, I wouldn’t have hired this actor. Oh, and I would have written a more interesting flashback or done away with the concept entirely. But at least get rid of the creepy bald asian dude.
Anyway, the show ended with a couple interesting twists. One is that Sawyer provoked a fight while he and Kate where doing slave labor. First of all, I think that the slave labor is just a psychological game to mess with their heads. Second of all, Sawyer revealed that the fight was actually a way for him to test how strong all The Others watching them were. But then we find out that Ben (the Head Other) listened to Sawyer tell this all to Kate. Here’s what makes that interesting. At first, we think that Sawyer has The Others figured out and that he’s going to make an escape attempt or something. But then we have to think that The Others are going to lure them into making an escape attempt to teach them a lesson. So, in other words, we really have no idea WHAT’S going to happen. But we know that SOMETHING’S going to happen. And I’m really looking forward to finding out what that “something” is.
The other interesting twist was when Ben revealed to Jack that The Others have contact with the outside world. To prove it, he showed Jack video of the Red Sox winning the World Series, which Jack naturally didn’t believe until he saw it. As Jack was staring at the video all slack-jawed, Ben told him that if Jack cooperates, he could go home. And that’s “home” as in “not on the island anymore” home.
That raises all sorts of questions. What would you do to get off the island? And is the island really worth getting off of? I mean, sure there’s cool stuff back in the real world, like TV and internet porn. But there’s also the continuing angst of the Cubs refusing to win a World Series. If I told you that you could spend the rest of your life living on a tropical island, would you turn me down?
But let’s say that you decide you want off the island. You’re sick of eating the Dharma rations. You want real food. You want a real bed. You just want to go home and let the dog out. Well, what would you be willing to do to get home? Would you kill someone? Would you put one of your friends in danger? Would you cut off a finger? What are your limits? And could you live with yourself afterwards? More importantly, could you live with not knowing the secrets of the island? I don’t think I could. In fact, I’d have no problem becoming all buddy-buddy with Ben just to find out why the hell they crashed and what the fuck was up with those polar bears. But maybe that’s just me.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Midgets of the Midway
Last night, one of my friends who moved to D.C. (Foster) stopped in Chicago for a brief layover. So a bunch of us went to Real Time Sports in Elk Grove to watch Monday Night Football. To my surprise, Jerry Azumah, a former Chicago Bear was there as well. He was doing some sort of promotion, giving away XM satellite radios or something. But the amazing thing to me was just how small Jerry Azumah was.
For those who don’t know, Jerry Azumah played cornerback for the Bears. He was also the NCAA leading rusher at University of New Hampshire. That’s sort of like being the tallest midget. It doesn’t mean much. Anyway, for some reason, I always assumed that football players were HUGE. I mean, they all LOOK huge. But last night, I had the opportunity to stand next to Jerry, and I just couldn’t get over the fact that he was a tiny man.
Now part of that, no doubt, has to do with me being way overweight. Next to me, Gilbert Grape’s mom starts to look svelte. But I’m not a tall man, no matter how fat I get. And Jerry wasn’t really any taller than me. Maybe an inch or two. (According to the NFL website, he's 5'10". Okay, then I'm 5'9". The Wife would love THAT.)
And Jerry was very small in the upper body. He was definitely cut (you could tell by the skin-tight shirt he was wearing), but he wouldn’t be mistaken for a body builder. Although, at the risk of sounding gay, it looked like he had pretty thick legs and a big butt. That must be where he hides the 192 pounds that the NFL website says he weighs. I'm guessing he's hiding sandbags in those pants. Anyway, I’m guessing that if you’re going to be a cornerback or wide receiver in the NFL, big legs and a big butt are more important than huge shoulders and big biceps.
Either way, I was thoroughly unimpressed with the physique of Jerry Azumah. It made me think that *I* could have played for the Bears. If only I lost 40 pounds. And grew a couple inches. And had some talent. But other than that, I could totally play for them.
For those who don’t know, Jerry Azumah played cornerback for the Bears. He was also the NCAA leading rusher at University of New Hampshire. That’s sort of like being the tallest midget. It doesn’t mean much. Anyway, for some reason, I always assumed that football players were HUGE. I mean, they all LOOK huge. But last night, I had the opportunity to stand next to Jerry, and I just couldn’t get over the fact that he was a tiny man.
Now part of that, no doubt, has to do with me being way overweight. Next to me, Gilbert Grape’s mom starts to look svelte. But I’m not a tall man, no matter how fat I get. And Jerry wasn’t really any taller than me. Maybe an inch or two. (According to the NFL website, he's 5'10". Okay, then I'm 5'9". The Wife would love THAT.)
And Jerry was very small in the upper body. He was definitely cut (you could tell by the skin-tight shirt he was wearing), but he wouldn’t be mistaken for a body builder. Although, at the risk of sounding gay, it looked like he had pretty thick legs and a big butt. That must be where he hides the 192 pounds that the NFL website says he weighs. I'm guessing he's hiding sandbags in those pants. Anyway, I’m guessing that if you’re going to be a cornerback or wide receiver in the NFL, big legs and a big butt are more important than huge shoulders and big biceps.
Either way, I was thoroughly unimpressed with the physique of Jerry Azumah. It made me think that *I* could have played for the Bears. If only I lost 40 pounds. And grew a couple inches. And had some talent. But other than that, I could totally play for them.
Monday, October 09, 2006
Advanced for His Age
The Wife and I were both pretty smart growing up. (Whether that holds true today is certainly up for debate.) You could say that we were “advanced” for our ages. And I’m proud to say that Luke is too. Luke is almost 20 months old, but he’s already entering the Terrible Twos!
This weekend, The Wife took off with her Mommie group to head up to my family’s cabin in WI. (I think I’ve been calling it the Ponderosa. I should look that up. I’m WAY too forgetful with these nicknames.) Basically, they went up there to drink and get the hell away from their kids. And I really can’t say that I blame any of them. Especially The Wife, who was kind enough to take Luke out of town (and away from me) all last weekend. And to be honest, I was sort of looking forward to spending some time with Luke. You know, some quality male bonding time.
Saturday started out fine. Luke is really getting into his trucks. He’s also a big fan of Thomas the Tank Engine. We have Comcast cable and they have Thomas on InDemand. So basically, Thomas is available whenever we want it. And Luke wants it a lot. I’d say that about once an hour, he looks at me and says, “Choo Choo show?” What’s funny is that he’s started watching Sesame Street, which he naturally calls “Choo Choo Street.”
Anyway, we had a lot of fun on Saturday, but on Sunday he must have gotten a little tired of this whole no-Mommy thing. He was NOT in a good mood at all. Luke likes going for rides in my truck, so figured I’d head to Home Depot with him. All I needed was a screw. One measly little screw. (Get your mind out of the gutter.) So I grabbed Luke, put him in the truck and headed to Home Depot. We got there and I went to get him out. He told me to close the door. He didn’t want to get out. Now, a smart man would have just left him in the car, ran in, gotten the screw, and been back out in about 30 seconds. But since I didn’t want to get arrested for leaving a child in the car, I figured I’d take Luke inside with me. BIG mistake.
Luke screamed the WHOLE time I was in Home Depot. He wriggled and fussed and refused to be held. So I’d put him down. And he’d take off screaming, running in random directions. This continued for about 10 minutes. At one point, he’d thrown himself face first on the floor and was wriggling backwards down an aisle, screaming the whole time.
And of course, when I picked him up to head home, he was miserable. He didn’t want me to hold him, didn’t want to get in the car, didn’t want anything until I said the magic words “ice cream.” You know, perhaps this was just an elaborate ploy to get ice cream out of me. If so, it worked.
Luke continued to be a pill all Sunday morning, so I was quite relieved when noon came around and I got to put him down for a nap. I put him in his crib and sat down to watch the Bears game. I noticed that Luke kept talking to himself. This isn’t a rare occurrence. He usually talks himself to sleep. Only this time, he never stopped talking. After an hour, I heard him calling me. I waited a little longer until he basically started crying. Apparently, this nap wasn’t going to take.
So I got Luke down from his crib and let him play with his trucks. Except he wanted me to play with him. I tried to get him to watch football, but it wasn’t working. He just wanted to watch Choo Choo Street. After about an hour of driving me nuts, The Wife finally came home from her weekend away to put an end to my misery. You know, this might be the first time I’ve ever said that the arrival of The Wife put an end to my misery. But since we’re going to be having more kids and Luke’s not even CLOSE to being done with his Terrible Twos, I’m sure it won’t be the last.
This weekend, The Wife took off with her Mommie group to head up to my family’s cabin in WI. (I think I’ve been calling it the Ponderosa. I should look that up. I’m WAY too forgetful with these nicknames.) Basically, they went up there to drink and get the hell away from their kids. And I really can’t say that I blame any of them. Especially The Wife, who was kind enough to take Luke out of town (and away from me) all last weekend. And to be honest, I was sort of looking forward to spending some time with Luke. You know, some quality male bonding time.
Saturday started out fine. Luke is really getting into his trucks. He’s also a big fan of Thomas the Tank Engine. We have Comcast cable and they have Thomas on InDemand. So basically, Thomas is available whenever we want it. And Luke wants it a lot. I’d say that about once an hour, he looks at me and says, “Choo Choo show?” What’s funny is that he’s started watching Sesame Street, which he naturally calls “Choo Choo Street.”
Anyway, we had a lot of fun on Saturday, but on Sunday he must have gotten a little tired of this whole no-Mommy thing. He was NOT in a good mood at all. Luke likes going for rides in my truck, so figured I’d head to Home Depot with him. All I needed was a screw. One measly little screw. (Get your mind out of the gutter.) So I grabbed Luke, put him in the truck and headed to Home Depot. We got there and I went to get him out. He told me to close the door. He didn’t want to get out. Now, a smart man would have just left him in the car, ran in, gotten the screw, and been back out in about 30 seconds. But since I didn’t want to get arrested for leaving a child in the car, I figured I’d take Luke inside with me. BIG mistake.
Luke screamed the WHOLE time I was in Home Depot. He wriggled and fussed and refused to be held. So I’d put him down. And he’d take off screaming, running in random directions. This continued for about 10 minutes. At one point, he’d thrown himself face first on the floor and was wriggling backwards down an aisle, screaming the whole time.
And of course, when I picked him up to head home, he was miserable. He didn’t want me to hold him, didn’t want to get in the car, didn’t want anything until I said the magic words “ice cream.” You know, perhaps this was just an elaborate ploy to get ice cream out of me. If so, it worked.
Luke continued to be a pill all Sunday morning, so I was quite relieved when noon came around and I got to put him down for a nap. I put him in his crib and sat down to watch the Bears game. I noticed that Luke kept talking to himself. This isn’t a rare occurrence. He usually talks himself to sleep. Only this time, he never stopped talking. After an hour, I heard him calling me. I waited a little longer until he basically started crying. Apparently, this nap wasn’t going to take.
So I got Luke down from his crib and let him play with his trucks. Except he wanted me to play with him. I tried to get him to watch football, but it wasn’t working. He just wanted to watch Choo Choo Street. After about an hour of driving me nuts, The Wife finally came home from her weekend away to put an end to my misery. You know, this might be the first time I’ve ever said that the arrival of The Wife put an end to my misery. But since we’re going to be having more kids and Luke’s not even CLOSE to being done with his Terrible Twos, I’m sure it won’t be the last.
