Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Rollin'... In Style
This weekend, I went up to the family house in Wisconsin. (I assigned it a nickname, but now I can't remember it. Crap.) It was a work weekend. My brother came up with me to help me finish the basement. (My mom also came up to feed us, which was immeasurably wonderful.)
On the way up, we talked about numerous things. One of the things we talked about was the vehicles we drive. As our families are expanding, we're getting bigger and bigger cars. I mentioned that I was thinking about getting a minivan next. My brother scoffed at the idea, saying he'd never get one.
"Sure, they have more room, get better mileage and are more comfortable, but I could never own one." Why not? "Because it's a MINIVAN."
And my brother's not alone in thinking this. Hell, I used to think this. Then 6 months ago, my brother-in-law got married in Sacramento and we rented one. It was GREAT. I fell in love with it. Now I'm actually looking forward to getting one.
And that's when I realized that I've lost all my coolness. I was never that cool to begin with. (After all, I was captain of my math team in high school.) But admitting that I wanted a minivan was just the icing on the cake. Minivans are SO practical, especially after driving impractical cars like a huge-ass pickup truck or a tiny Jeep. And at this point in my life, I'd rather make my life easier than look cool.
The problem is that this thinking leads to polyester pants pulled up to your armpits and cutting the lawn in black socks and sandals.
On the way up, we talked about numerous things. One of the things we talked about was the vehicles we drive. As our families are expanding, we're getting bigger and bigger cars. I mentioned that I was thinking about getting a minivan next. My brother scoffed at the idea, saying he'd never get one.
"Sure, they have more room, get better mileage and are more comfortable, but I could never own one." Why not? "Because it's a MINIVAN."
And my brother's not alone in thinking this. Hell, I used to think this. Then 6 months ago, my brother-in-law got married in Sacramento and we rented one. It was GREAT. I fell in love with it. Now I'm actually looking forward to getting one.
And that's when I realized that I've lost all my coolness. I was never that cool to begin with. (After all, I was captain of my math team in high school.) But admitting that I wanted a minivan was just the icing on the cake. Minivans are SO practical, especially after driving impractical cars like a huge-ass pickup truck or a tiny Jeep. And at this point in my life, I'd rather make my life easier than look cool.
The problem is that this thinking leads to polyester pants pulled up to your armpits and cutting the lawn in black socks and sandals.
Monday, October 08, 2007
Finally, a Solution to Mid-East Peace
For millenia, the mid-east has been a hotbed of violence. I guess that's what happens when three major religions start within spitting distance of each other. And as we all know, what makes religion so great is it's "I'm right, you're dead" attitude. But after years of struggle and thousands (millions?) of unnecessary deaths, someone finally came up with a solution. That man is none other than... Bryan Adams.
Yes, the Canadian rock "star" who penned such great hits as "Summer of 69" and "Everything I Do (I Do It For You)" has decided to play a concert in the mid-east. I think his intention is that if everyone in the mid-east can just agree on one point (how much Bryan Adams sucks), then maybe that will unite them and end all the fighting.
If I were Canada, I'd be a little concerned. The Jews and Muslims might start teaming up and declare war on our friends up north. "No more Bryan Adams!" Yeah, take that you puck-slapping maple suckers.
Yes, the Canadian rock "star" who penned such great hits as "Summer of 69" and "Everything I Do (I Do It For You)" has decided to play a concert in the mid-east. I think his intention is that if everyone in the mid-east can just agree on one point (how much Bryan Adams sucks), then maybe that will unite them and end all the fighting.
If I were Canada, I'd be a little concerned. The Jews and Muslims might start teaming up and declare war on our friends up north. "No more Bryan Adams!" Yeah, take that you puck-slapping maple suckers.
