Wednesday, May 17, 2006
I am a Survivor!
I had training this week. Three days of it. My mind is still spinning. It's just so terribly mind-numbing. The problem is that I have to sit there and listen to someone drone on for hours on end. (Now I know how it must feel for anyone that drinks with me.) The urge to punch the speaker in the face is overwhelming (and I thank all my co-drinkers for resisting said urge).
Today's training was me, another new hire (Vince) and the speaker. After 90 minutes (and a coffee), I was completely wiped out. When the speaker asked if we needed a break, I just bolted out of the room. 2 seconds later, we were talking about the NBA playoffs and I immediately perked up. I haven't even been following the NBA playoffs. But I actually got the opportunity to have an interactive conversation. It was great. The coffee I had after that was complete overkill.
(By the way, LAF has the coolest damn coffee makers I've ever seen. Basically, you have these "pods" of coffee. They look like oversized creamers. You put them in the machine. You press the button. BAM! You got coffee. And the coffee maker throws out the pod all by itself. And it's tasty (French Vanilla). Not to mention free. I have a feeling I'm going to be completely hooked on coffee by, um, Friday.)
Anyway, since I managed to survive 3 days of training, I thought I'd talk about something else I survived: this season of Survivor. This was a rather unenjoyable season of Survivor, which is one of my favorite shows. The problem was that they kept around the wrong people all season. "Wrong" being defined by "not people I would have kept around." To make matters worse, the $1,000,000 winner (spoiler alert), Aras, was probably my least favorite guy on the show. Of course, that's happened virtually every season. I'm still bitter about Colby losing in the second season. I had a total man-crush on him.
This season seemed especially annoying to me because few people switched alliances. These people get themselves into alliances on the first day of the show and then they refuse to break them. This season, there were 4 people who HATED each other, but they stayed in their alliance. My rule of thumb is to vote out the annoying people first. (That's why I'd be the first guy voted out. I can just imagine the comments as they're voting me out. "I don't get his sense of humor at all." "He kept making fun of me and laughing. What's his problem?" "God, that guy ripped the most disgusting fart I've ever smelled." "How did he manage to smuggle a bottle of Jack Daniels onto the show?")
I think the creepiest thing about this season was Shane. This guy had one of the weirdest parental relationship I've seen since Mommie Dearest. Shane is in his mid-30's and has a 13-year-old son. But Shane claims that his son is his best friend. And he was crying the whole show about how he missed him. Later on, he actually got to spend time with his son thanks to a reward challenge. I thought for sure they were going to start making out. It was just creepy. Don't get me wrong. I'm sure Luke will be MY best friend, but that'll be a result of a process of elimination. Since my current friends will have ex-communicated me, Luke will be my only option. In fact, I'll probably end up getting a doctorate wherever he goes to college. That way he can introduce me to all his freshmen special lady friends. And they can get restraining orders on me.
Okay, I'm just rambling. I can't believe how tired I am from all the training this week. But since I don't have any training tomorrow, I'm hoping I can post at least ONE entry during the day. We shall see.
Today's training was me, another new hire (Vince) and the speaker. After 90 minutes (and a coffee), I was completely wiped out. When the speaker asked if we needed a break, I just bolted out of the room. 2 seconds later, we were talking about the NBA playoffs and I immediately perked up. I haven't even been following the NBA playoffs. But I actually got the opportunity to have an interactive conversation. It was great. The coffee I had after that was complete overkill.
(By the way, LAF has the coolest damn coffee makers I've ever seen. Basically, you have these "pods" of coffee. They look like oversized creamers. You put them in the machine. You press the button. BAM! You got coffee. And the coffee maker throws out the pod all by itself. And it's tasty (French Vanilla). Not to mention free. I have a feeling I'm going to be completely hooked on coffee by, um, Friday.)
Anyway, since I managed to survive 3 days of training, I thought I'd talk about something else I survived: this season of Survivor. This was a rather unenjoyable season of Survivor, which is one of my favorite shows. The problem was that they kept around the wrong people all season. "Wrong" being defined by "not people I would have kept around." To make matters worse, the $1,000,000 winner (spoiler alert), Aras, was probably my least favorite guy on the show. Of course, that's happened virtually every season. I'm still bitter about Colby losing in the second season. I had a total man-crush on him.
This season seemed especially annoying to me because few people switched alliances. These people get themselves into alliances on the first day of the show and then they refuse to break them. This season, there were 4 people who HATED each other, but they stayed in their alliance. My rule of thumb is to vote out the annoying people first. (That's why I'd be the first guy voted out. I can just imagine the comments as they're voting me out. "I don't get his sense of humor at all." "He kept making fun of me and laughing. What's his problem?" "God, that guy ripped the most disgusting fart I've ever smelled." "How did he manage to smuggle a bottle of Jack Daniels onto the show?")
I think the creepiest thing about this season was Shane. This guy had one of the weirdest parental relationship I've seen since Mommie Dearest. Shane is in his mid-30's and has a 13-year-old son. But Shane claims that his son is his best friend. And he was crying the whole show about how he missed him. Later on, he actually got to spend time with his son thanks to a reward challenge. I thought for sure they were going to start making out. It was just creepy. Don't get me wrong. I'm sure Luke will be MY best friend, but that'll be a result of a process of elimination. Since my current friends will have ex-communicated me, Luke will be my only option. In fact, I'll probably end up getting a doctorate wherever he goes to college. That way he can introduce me to all his freshmen special lady friends. And they can get restraining orders on me.
Okay, I'm just rambling. I can't believe how tired I am from all the training this week. But since I don't have any training tomorrow, I'm hoping I can post at least ONE entry during the day. We shall see.
