Wednesday, March 29, 2006
It Was Bound To Happen
For as long as I can remember, I've been a good sleeper. No, I was a great sleeper. If sleeping were a competitive sport, I'd be the Babe Ruth of sleeping. (By that I mean, I'd be ugly and out-of-shape, but still producing great results.) I'd be a first ballot Sleeping Hall of Fame inductee. And I wouldn't even attend the ceremony, because (duh) I'd be asleep.
I've slept on grills in the back of station wagons. I've slept in cars, on planes, and in trains. I've slept in stores and at work. I slept through Barbara Bush's speech to Marquette when my oldest brother graduated. I've slept through entire conversations (in which I was an active participant).
I used to deliver newspapers in the morning. I would wake up, roll the papers, ride my bike 3 miles delivering them, and then crawl right back into bed. In fact, no matter how much time I spent awake, I could ALWAYS fall back asleep. All I had to do was lay back down. Sometimes, I didn't even have to do that much.
A few years ago, I would routinely stay out drinking Saturday night until 5:00 am. I got up for work Monday at 5:00 am. So, in 24 hours, I'd manage to get not one, but TWO nights of sleep. And I never had one of those infernal internal clocks that The Wife has. She claims that when 6:00 rolls around, she wakes up and can't fall asleep. Come on, that's just silly. Who can't fall back asleep. That only happens to crazy people.
Well, call me crazy because it's happening to me now. And it's blowing my mind. It happened for the first time a couple of weeks ago, and it just keeps getting worse. After getting just 6 hours of sleep Saturday night, I woke up and couldn't fall back asleep. I laid there thinking, "this is ridiculous. I'm The Dow, for god's sake! I can sleep whenever I want! Sleep! Now!!!" It didn't work.
There are a couple things at play here that are really impacting my ability to sleep. One is Luke. That little jerk wakes up at 6:00 every morning. (That's not fair. Sometimes, he sleeps in and doesn't get up until 6:30.) Since The Wife's usually already up, she has no problem letting me sleep and taking care of him. The problem? Not enough soundproofing in my house. And Luke is VERY vocal. So I hear him running all over the house, chattering to himself in his Dow voice (i.e. very LOUD), "da da da da da!"
The other factor is that I can't stay up late anymore. It's not that I don't want to. But now that I'm a father, I've become MY father. So not only do I scratch myself in very inappropriate places, but I can't stay awake past 11:00. (I also shake my fist at the kids in my neighborhood with their loud music and fast cars. Slow down, you punks!) Of course, part of the reason I can't stay up late is because I have no reason to stay up late. With a son at home, it's hard to get into the city for an all-night drinking bender at Nick's Uptown. (There's more reason for an all-night bender, just less ability to have one.) And after having two beers at home, I'm passed out in the recliner being smothered by my cats. Isn't my life just glamorous?
I've slept on grills in the back of station wagons. I've slept in cars, on planes, and in trains. I've slept in stores and at work. I slept through Barbara Bush's speech to Marquette when my oldest brother graduated. I've slept through entire conversations (in which I was an active participant).
I used to deliver newspapers in the morning. I would wake up, roll the papers, ride my bike 3 miles delivering them, and then crawl right back into bed. In fact, no matter how much time I spent awake, I could ALWAYS fall back asleep. All I had to do was lay back down. Sometimes, I didn't even have to do that much.
A few years ago, I would routinely stay out drinking Saturday night until 5:00 am. I got up for work Monday at 5:00 am. So, in 24 hours, I'd manage to get not one, but TWO nights of sleep. And I never had one of those infernal internal clocks that The Wife has. She claims that when 6:00 rolls around, she wakes up and can't fall asleep. Come on, that's just silly. Who can't fall back asleep. That only happens to crazy people.
Well, call me crazy because it's happening to me now. And it's blowing my mind. It happened for the first time a couple of weeks ago, and it just keeps getting worse. After getting just 6 hours of sleep Saturday night, I woke up and couldn't fall back asleep. I laid there thinking, "this is ridiculous. I'm The Dow, for god's sake! I can sleep whenever I want! Sleep! Now!!!" It didn't work.
There are a couple things at play here that are really impacting my ability to sleep. One is Luke. That little jerk wakes up at 6:00 every morning. (That's not fair. Sometimes, he sleeps in and doesn't get up until 6:30.) Since The Wife's usually already up, she has no problem letting me sleep and taking care of him. The problem? Not enough soundproofing in my house. And Luke is VERY vocal. So I hear him running all over the house, chattering to himself in his Dow voice (i.e. very LOUD), "da da da da da!"
The other factor is that I can't stay up late anymore. It's not that I don't want to. But now that I'm a father, I've become MY father. So not only do I scratch myself in very inappropriate places, but I can't stay awake past 11:00. (I also shake my fist at the kids in my neighborhood with their loud music and fast cars. Slow down, you punks!) Of course, part of the reason I can't stay up late is because I have no reason to stay up late. With a son at home, it's hard to get into the city for an all-night drinking bender at Nick's Uptown. (There's more reason for an all-night bender, just less ability to have one.) And after having two beers at home, I'm passed out in the recliner being smothered by my cats. Isn't my life just glamorous?
